Jane Austen, Emma: "Men of sense, whatever you may choose to say, do not want silly wives."
MDB: He might as well have met you with milk and cookies and said "Miilz theres a thunderstorm! I'm scared!"!
[Post "BS- Circus video]
DWS: This from the girl who brought me Two girls One cup!
The Guardian; Charlie Brooker on nightclubs:
"Because you might get a shag," is the usual response. Really? If that's the only way you can find a partner - preening and jigging about like a desperate animal - you shouldn't be attempting to breed in the first place. What's your next trick? Inventing fire? People like you are going to spin civilisation into reverse. You're a moron, and so is that haircut you're trying to impress. Any offspring you eventually blast out should be drowned in a pan before they can do any harm. Or open any more nightclubs.
Even if you somehow avoid reproducing, isn't it a lot of hard work for very little reward? Seven hours hopping about in a hellish, reverberating bunker in exchange for sharing 64 febrile, panting pelvic thrusts with someone who'll snore and dribble into your pillow till 11 o'clock in the morning, before waking up beside you with their hair in a mess, blinking like a dizzy cat and smelling vaguely like a ham baguette? Really, why bother? Why not just stay at home punching yourself in the face?
Russell Howard:
Who the fuck has a pet cow?!
RP: Oh!!! Santa Claus! ...And his wife ;)
Santa X: No presents for you!
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